U know when I said……

So I recently posted frustrated posts and I still am confident I don’t know anything. I had the honor of meeting such great women travelers at the airport yesterday. I realized that not only are we all struggling with something, but it is was so easy to connect with them. It was like we were all friends. One of the women was 70 and the other was 52. I am 41. They both had great perspectives on many different things ranging from child rearing to taking care of yourself. I need to build my friend network again. I hadn’t done much in that department. I miss having girlfriends to chit chat with and hang out with. I need to become a better friend because I get so wrapped up in work and my personal life with relationships, that I forget I need solid friends to hang with. I know we are all in the phases of our lives that we are busy with teenage kids, work, and falling apart marriages. I wonder what the next phase for me is and how that will feel. I never gave myself any space to be alone and just be. In my mind, I couldn’t stay with my husband and I was subconsciously trying to fill that “aloneness” with another. I know deep in my heart, I need to just relax and just be. I need to build my business, take care of my kids, and not have the worry of disappointing someone else because I didn’t make time. I find myself spreading myself thin and not wanting to do anything but sit in my bed. That is not a way to live. I clearly don’t have the answers and nothing is easy. Heartbreak is inevitable. I’m sitting on my deck shaking my head right now. The weather is perfect, the breeze is relaxing, and I should be enjoying it.

xoxoxxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo