Only in the face of adversity…..

Only in the face of adversity do you see someone’s true colors. When something unfortunate or bad happens, who is with you? Those who are with you and come to your aid are the one’s you need to keep in your life. On the flip side of the coin, are you the person who stays and helps or are you the one who has better things to do than comfort a friend? Life is a strange beast. One moment you are smiling and the next you are on the verge of tears. The things that happen to us, good or bad, shape who we are. If you put your whole heart and soul into life, as if you have never been broken, you will get back 10 fold. It is not easy trusting others because most of us have had trust broken or have been used. However, my advice is, do it anyway. You will never ever find the one who is worth trusting if you don’t allow  yourself to be vulnerable. In the face of adversity you will discover the true friends, the ones who love you, the ones who are worth more than any mega millions lottery ticket. Money comes and goes, but, a true friend is priceless. That feeling you get when your whole body is flooded with feelings because someone has shown you their most beautiful true colors, is an amazing experience. I hope you find true friends in this world. It isn’t about social status, who likes your posts on social media, or compliments on pictures you post. It is about true love for one another. I really believe there is more good than bad people in this world and in my opinion, love will always prevail. Fill your soul with lovely thoughts and do good in this world. Be the change you wish to see. If you want to change the world, change yourself and you are done! Being a good example and just being there for someone is enough.  Make memories and have new experiences. Find the good in the bad and laugh often. Sometimes laughing can make you feel better even when you feel defeated. Allow someone to pick you up and allow yourself to be vulnerable. Amazing things happen out of one’s comfort zone. Come out from under your comfortable rock and allow yourself to experience real life.

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rock

Bring the room down………….

Attitude is everything. There is always one person in a group that is just so negative. Don’t be that person. That one person can infect the whole group. The type of energy you give off is what will turn into reality for the group. That is the same with life. Yes, I know things happen and life isn’t always roses and sunshine. It is how we get past those curve balls that will determine how we view the outcome. I do believe to my core that if you cultivate a positive attitude, you will be aware of more solutions. If you focus on the bad, that is all you will find. If you try to keep an open mind and look for solutions, you will find those as well. Recognizing that we have emotions and dealing with them is important to being healthy inside and out. Sometimes we just need to go in our car and scream our heads off and let it out. That is ok. Dealing with negative feelings is healthy. Dwelling on them is not. My philosophy is this, deal and move forward. Try to focus today on what is good. Find the good in those you meet. Find the sunshine through the clouds. I wake up with a grateful heart and I thank God for giving me another day to try again. We all have faults but sometimes those faults are not really faults at all. We look at ourselves through foggy lenses. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Love yourself. Accept yourself and realize you are enough. This world is full of people who don’t think they are good enough for anyone and I believe that is because they don’t accept themselves. Every day we can improve our behaviors and attitude. Be enough for yourself and love with an open heart.  You have nothing to lose and only to gain.

 

 

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It is already in you….

Everything you need to be successful is already in you. We can learn from others how to go about tasks or strategies for success, but you already possess your strengths that make you unique. We each offer this world a perspective that no one else has. Our experiences shape who we are and we can use those experiences to help others. The story of the baby born without legs who grew up in an adoptive family to be a gymnast, was a gymnast because it was already in her. Her name is Jennifer Bricker . Her parents never told her she couldn’t do something and she always believed she could do anything. Her idol was a famous gymnast. Later she found out that she was the sister of Dominique Moceanu.  The talent that was in her, was not taught, it was already within her. She had this burning desire to be a gymnast and she was because she pushed herself, even though, she was born without legs. We all have some burning desire to accomplish something. It is up to you to explore and really dig deep down into your soul and find what that burning desire is.  Many of us go through life feeling unfulfilled and unsatisfied. I really feel that feeling stems from deep within us because we are not living our full potential. Surround yourself with people that lift you up and have huge goals and aspirations. The feeling to be more is very contagious. Light that fire within you! We are all a part of the human experience. Are you ready to discover who you are?

 

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Ideas implemented.

I was sitting at home really feeling like painting something. I had these ideas floating in my head. My daughter and I headed to the fabric store to find some canvases right away. I already had the paint so I was that much closer to making my vision a reality. The problem with ideas is that most of them we all have are literally gone into the air within 5 seconds of thinking it. Poof! Gone!

I knew that I needed to make a move into the implementation direction. I feel that making myself move, created momentum for other areas of my life too. Sometimes all we need is to make a small, bold move and then we changed the course of our life. A co-worker asked me, “why is it so much easier being unhealthy?” My reply was because we don’t have to force ourselves to switch directions. Being complacent is easy. I don’t want to be that person. What could’ve been, will not take over my head anymore. Create yourself, form yourself, and thrive.

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Who we think we are, defines us.

I have different views of who I think I am. If I go back to grade school, I can still hear some of the kids who were mean to me, the girls who were cruel to me in middle school, and the kids that talked behind my back in high school. If I allow those feelings and words to drive me, I will be what I think they think of me. It took me years to get those thoughts and feelings under control. I went through life hating my nose for instance. I was always told it was too big and it made me ugly. Kids can be cruel and kids also can say things that are mean maybe because they feel bad about themselves. We just don’t know what is going on in their head and therefore, we can’t allow it to rule our heads either. You are not who you think other people think you are. One freedom I have found in my 40’s is, I can be the person I want to be. I had a boyfriend tell me in the last year that if another guy saw me naked, he would never call me again. Those words hurt, however, as I looked at the person saying it, I wondered if that was true, why did he want to stay with me. Of course, we are no longer together. Saying mean things to others and putting them down is a true measure of how that person views themselves. Either that, or they are just trying to control you by trying to take your self-esteem away. In any case, don’t allow it to define you. Who are you? More importantly, who are you to yourself. I got dressed up yesterday and took myself out on a date with myself. It may sound strange but if I do not value myself, why should anyone else? Love yourself truly. That is the most freeing feeling. Accepting yourself completely is what love really is. You don’t need anyone to make you whole. A life partner should add not take away. You are whole already. Make deeper connections.

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I’m glad I did.

I was in my living room last night when a friend of mine called. I was invited to go workout, pass and everything taken care of. I said an immediate “no thank you, I would love to but…..” After the words slipped out of my mouth, I said “wait, I will call you back in 10 minutes and give you an answer if I can find my workout clothes.” She said ok. I am glad I got out of my comfortable house and just showed up. At first I really didn’t want to go because it took effort. My words of wisdom hit me in the face and I followed my own advice. I braved the bitter cold and got my butt to the gym. The first 10 minutes on a machine seemed like it took forever, then I said let’s hit a mile and then we can stop. We hit a mile, went on another machine which went faster. Then we hit the weights. I could barely make it through the first 10 min without wanting to quit and before you know it, we were there for 90 min! It felt great!!! I was so glad we pushed each other. We all need to get uncomfortable and push not only ourselves, but others. It is amazing what happens with a little bit of encouragement. Simple steps of just showing up can be life changing! Most people don’t show up and then they never experience change.

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What motivates you?

Many of us need to really be “moved” to be motivated to change the direction of our lives. For some of us, that could be a devastating event and for others, they are just naturally curious. What gets you going? For me, it is the internal drive to improve myself. If I am unsure how to do something or I am unaware of how to do something, I usually research it and try it. Sometimes, I realize I don’t like whatever task I am doing, but I learned something in the process. If we go day in and day out, eating relatively the same food, falling into a similar pattern for the day, and never really looking to learn something new, then we get bored. I used to think I got bored of the job I was doing and then needed to find a new one. I have since realized, it is not the job, it was my life. I needed to grow my soul and cultivate my skills.  I like to shake things up and throw myself a curve ball. Doing that keeps my brain and my body motivated to do more. I know I need more of nature and becoming one with nature. I used to be so distracted by social media and not paying as much attention to who is real in my life. I am happy things have recently become even more clear. I have to say, life in your 40’s is divine.  What gets you motivated?

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